Honorary Negroeship for Auction on Ebay
Thanks to Allana from the comments section.
It was only a matter of time until a black person tried to capitalize off of this. It’s a great time to be black in America ain’t it? Barack Obama, Oprah, Hip Hop, high unemployment for everyone! If you’re melanin challenged, do you want to make be left out of this incredible moment in history? Larry King’s son doesn’t! But that’s because he’s not Eminem or Pau Gasol.
A blogger from the West-Coast is auctioning off an Honorary Blackness Certificate -complete with “authentication” by the 1980’s bepermed Rev Al Sharpton.
From the Ebay listing:
“The winner of this auction will receive a signed certificate in a strong mahogany frame proclaiming him or her an honorary Black person. The winner will also receive “Gibson’s Secret Guide to Being Black,” an easy to follow 10 step guide to being “down” in no time (see excerpt below).”
Roffle @ “strong mahogany frame”. The bidding starts at $10 and no one has staked a claim on it yet but there’s 7 days left. You would think that some hipsters would have already seen the irony in it and driven the price sky-high. But then there’s the economy keeping wallets shut. Oh and the fact that freely priced markets never lie. No matter how good some of us have it.. there’s probably no fair price for taking on the extra burden of being black in this country. I hope he’s paying Rev Al on commission.
If I were Barack Obama, I’d release this statement:
“Uh.. I’ve already given a speech on race relations in this country. That certificate of honorary blackness is cute.. real cute. But Look.. There’s no white America or black America. There’s the United States of America. By embracing our differences while understanding that our similarities are what make us a great nation, we can all come to a common ground where we can move this country forward without the distractions of bigotry. In the meantime… any white person who wants to slap on some extra spray-tan and be Barack Obama for a day without my Secret Service detail is welcomed to it.”
EDIT: Irony of ironies.. At first, I didn’t pay attention to that HuffPo page I linked to about Larry King’s son. But when I went back to close the tab, I noticed this as the banner ad:
Who needs a blackness certificate when jungle fever is for sale?